aromatics and culture low-down

In the last couple weeks I ride my bike an average of 30 miles a week. I enjoy this time with my thoughts, while I manually get to where I need to go. It makes me appreciate my destination-point more fully. I've also noticed that Thailand is the 'Land of a Thousand Scents!' Each yard introduces an entirely different powerfully strong aroma. It's very unusual.

We drive/ride on the left side of the road here. Well, sometimes! It's really just a suggestion, if you know what I mean. As I ride along I see a family of 4 on the back of a motorcycle, while the driver usually uses only one hand, because the other hand is holding his infant. hahaha! I'm so not kidding. Sometimes you'll see someone ride by and a dog, or better yet, a monkey is bracing themselves on the seat behind the driver. Even better, the monkey is in front of the driver holding on the handle bars.
Thailand is a free for all. Basically anything goes.
Well, almost anything...!
Yes, relationships are quite open here. Most people have a second wife or husband, yet it's taboo to sit with you feet pointing at anyone, nor can you touch the top of any ones head. This is very disrespectful! If a monk is seated, then you have to duck lower than him when you walk by.
Always greet and negotiate prices with a smile. The Thai's loathe confrontation. It is not a part of their culture. The Thai's are always full of giggles, because we "Pharangs" (white foreigners) are so different. They're not laughing at you in a rude way, they just don't get you. Honestly, I agree with the locals, when I sit back and watch many foreigners. We are quite funny!
Another interesting thing: They don't use toilet paper. Every "Hong nam," or 'dirty water closet' is equipped with a hose for cleaning. Yes, it's wet, and takes some getting use to, but you dry quickly, it's cleaner, and refreshing in this heat! :)
For the men, when you go to a club make sure the pretty Thai girl who's flirting with you is really a girl.... Lady-boys are notorious in this culture, and very respected! Families often raise one of their sons to be a lady-boy. I don't know why yet, but there's a book called: "My name Lan, you like me?" I'll read it next an let you know the reason. Bangkok is full of plastic surgeons and Dentists. Many people come here to get good work done for cheap. So, they may look pretty on the outside of their clothing, but make sure that underneath there isn't something external reminding you she/he's excited. ;)


Here's some important phrases you should know if you visit, or to impress your friends the next time you dine at an authentic Thai restaurant:
(KA ends most all phrases for WOMEN, and KAP ends most all phrases for MEN)
[Thai's can't pronounce R's, so they're all pronounced them with an L sound]
"Sawadee ka/Kap" Hello, good day, goodnight, etc.. It's a greeting on many levels with hands joined in front of the mouth.
"Korp Kuhn Ka/Kap" Thank you
"Kor" Please
"Se-bye de mai ka/kap?" How are you?
"Se-bye de" good
"De nak mak" very good
"Hong nam" Bathroom i.e., Peakaw, Hong Nam you tee nine?
"You tee nine?" Where is...
"Peakaw" Excuse me
"Yai" Big
"Lek lek" Small
"Check bin ka/kap" check please
"Mai ow ka/kap" I don't want
"Mai Chop" I don't like
"Chop chop" I like! :)
"Chop pick mak mak" I like very spicy! :)
"mai chop pick" I don't like spicy
"Pig-num-paw" Sliced Thai peppers
"Mae pen rai ka/kap" No problem
"Ruk" Love
"Cow-pat" Fried rice
"Gai" Chicken
"Moo" Pork
"Guhn" Shrimp

Nung One
Song Two
Sam Three
See Four
Ha! Five
Hoke Six
Jet Seven
Bad Eight
Gow Nine
Sip Ten
E-sip Twenty
Roy Hundred

That should get you started a bit. You say all of this with a smile, and you're golden! :D